Don’t be an emotional reaction – be a person

This quote is one that has helped me throughout my life.

I didn’t have a good education, and I my family life was full on alcoholism, aggression (domestic violence), denial (lots of lies) and a lack of love and care for us kids.

My father was an emotional reaction – not a person. He would get very angry at the drop on a hat.

This had us all very fearful of him…and I was never really able to really feel safe.

Keep your intense reactions for the bigger issues of life
(which day-to-day living does not provide)

It wasn’t until 2003 when I got sober from sex drugs and alcohol that I started to really learn stuff and work on my emotional intelligence and also my interest in thigs other than sex drugs and rock and roll.

___________________________________

When we constantly react to things, the habit becomes a habit.

The more we react the more we will feel the emotional sharpness.

DO YOU ABUSE YOUR EMOTIONAL SYSTEM?

• over-reacting in a wholesale fashion;

• living by misplaced importance;

• devaluing your emotional currency;

• destroying your inner peace;

• making life unreasonably hard for those close to you;

• alienating friendship.

I did this with anger. So the slightest upset, my anger would kick in hard and I would feel it sharply. Took me years to get out of this habit, as it had been in place since I was a child.

I currently have a neighbor that reacts to my TV when I have my front door open. The more he unconsciously reacts by slamming his door, the more he feels the emotion. By doing the slamming the emotion is reenforced, and more the sharp feelings are felt (Rinse and Repeat).

It’s a bit like being stuck on a hamster wheel.

Awareness is the key to making changes for a better life.

Gavin.

touch wood

Hi All.

Doing well at the moment hence the ‘touch wood’ thing because I hope I don’t jinx it.

All the other sayings like: ‘be careful what you wish for’ and all that stuff has meaning because when things get better old habits can return and some of those things and behaviors can be not so good.

I’m a FULL-BLOWN addict. I’ve had addiction behaviors since I was about seven years old, and they just got worse and worse as I got older. What I notice is that when things are going bad my addiction stuff is suppressed. All the negative energy overrides the addictions.

It’s only been about three weeks since things have improved but my thinking has recently changed, so much so that some of my addictive stuff has returned. Nothing serious, but enough to really notice the change.

One of the many things that has been so good is…I’ve gotten so much done at home. Some stuff I’d been putting off for four years. So, my home is looking amazing. Still more to do, but I’m so grateful all that I’ve achieved in the last three weeks. G.

What about you? Is change something you are wherry of?

Five rules of life

Rule #1: What You Refuse to Face Will Control You

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” — Carl Jung

Rule #2: Your Persona Is Not Your Self

Jung warned about the danger of the persona—the mask you wear to be acceptable.

Your job title.

Your reputation.

Your “put-together” identity.

Rule #3: Meaning Is More Important Than Happiness

This rule offends modern self-help.

Rule #4: You Must Integrate Your Shadow—or It Will Sabotage You

The Shadow is the part of you you disown:

  • jealousy
  • selfishness
  • aggression
  • ambition
  • vulnerability

Rule #5: Individuation Is Lonely—but Non-Negotiable

Individuation—the process of becoming who you actually are—is Jung’s central idea.

Carl Jung’s Five Rules of Life

Quote: when you see the elephant’s tail…

When you see the elephant’s tail…

..you know the worst of things have passed,

and you are through to the good again.

I heard this quote in a TV series called: Friends and Neighbors (on Apple TV). It appealed to me due to the other quotes about elephants i.e. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

They say an elephant never forgets…and the proverbial elephant in the room.

For me ‘seeing the elephant’s tail’ means there is probably another elephant coming behind the first elephant 😀