re-blogged

other people’s posts

Video

Empowering Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse

if you get the time this is a very good video about males who are sexually abused as children.

for me it was very confusing because I didn’t know what was happening to me. The effect has been lifechanging for the bad. There was also a lot of shame (because I was male) that it happened to me, so I ended up hating myself. Therapy has helped. Also hearing from other men about their experiences has also helped. Gavin.

fantasy as a way of self-soothing

Fantasy was my main coping device for living in a dysfunctional family. Spiderman was one fantasy I had and would spend hours a day being Spiderman, climbing all over the veranda, making sure I wouldn’t touch the ground. Once I was sexually abused from age 6 to 9, I started to fantasy about having sex or be in sexual relationships with others. By the time I hit age 20 I was completely addicted to sexual fantasy and relationship fantasy.

I do have a relatively ‘normal’ fantasy where I have lots of money and a beautiful house and life. The only problem is that I’m still self-soothing with fantasy, instead of connecting with real people.

Gavin.

A fresh look at sexuality

This YouTube video is really informative and interesting about male and female sexuality.

I was particularly interested about female sexuality and how it is so different to males.

women’s ques are internal, and men’s are external. No surprise there…

The desire of the man is for the woman.

The desire of the woman is for the desire of the man.

Version 1.0.0

Men’s top 4 body parts they look up (when looking at porn) are…

  1. Brests
  2. Buttocks
  3. Feet
  4. Penis (large penis)

People who live in their bodies

I lived in my body for the first 33 years of my life.

I then had a massive breakdown and no longer lived in my body after that. Alcohol consumption also had a big role to play in me not living in my body anymore.

There are many benefits to living in your body.

  • You will mostly not be  overweight or underweight
  • You will mostly be fitter than the average person
  • You will live longer than the average person
  • You will likely be sexually active
  • You will feel things

The main downsides to living in your body will be

  • You will be potentially prone to OCD Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
  • You will get annoyed quickly
  • You may have difficulty with anger
  • Pain in the body may also be an issue
  • You may be a generally obsessive person about many things.

As a child I loved living in and body. I would jump and spin. Climb and swing from tree to tree. I was a master in gymnastics and I was obsessed with sex. As an adult my career was a body career. I was a fitness instructor and a dance teacher. I loved exercise so much, I would do it every day, and often overdo it in terms of exercise.

The other side of this is people living in their heads.

Benefits are:

  • Often highly intelligent
  • Clever
  • Enjoy reading
  • Like to argue 

The downside:

  • You will be prone to rumination
  • You may overthink things
  • You may be overweight or underweight
  • You may daydream a lot

Ultimately one’s goal is to live in the present moment.

the origin of the word used to describe unwanted content on the internet: spam

I didn’t know the origin of the word we use almost daily…spam. Now I know it was Monty Python.

…and now AI is now very much taking over the internet. You only have to look at the comments on Facebook, and the AI gives an accurate overview of what people are saying.

Why aren’t we disturbed by this?

RedBubble had bots look over my photos, to find anything they could use to delete my art. This art had been on sale and on their platform for over 20 years.

Not all AI is bad, but we should be aware of this issue.