trauma
noun1.
a deeply distressing or disturbing
experience.”
a personal trauma like the death of a child”
2.MEDICINEphysical injury.”rupture of the diaphragm caused by blunt trauma”
Childhood sexual abuse. 6 to 9.
Domestic violence. First 16 years.
Being bashed and raped. Age 19.
Being relentlessly stalked. 2007 to 2010. Three and a half years.
Neighbour from hell. 2013 to 2022. Eight and a half years.
As you can see if you add up all the years of trauma, there is a vast chunk of my life spent in trauma and abuse.
The cost has mostly been on my mental health.
Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Depression and more recently Bipolar 2.
At the moment my biggest issues are isolation. Lack of exercise and a need to regulate my diet. Getting there slowly. I have stopped drinking altogether which is excellent…and it also saves me a lot of money. Nightmares are a constant issue, but I’ve been having them since I was four, so used to dealing with them.
https://grow.org.au/ has helped me a lot over the years.
Whatever the level of disorder or other limitations in my life,
my existing situation can be constantly improved by good
habits of thinking and acting and cooperation with help.
Gavin.
Noir 
AMEN! I also have CPTSD but I don’t talk about it as much as my Bipolar 11. Which we share among others. I’ve been sexually abused by a parent, raped 3 times, physical abuse, mental abuse and stalked. My new med is finally allowing me to think more clearly, I’m much happier, haven’t been this happy is 3-4 years maybe longer. I’m so glad you can are moving forward, you’ve rebuilt your life and now it’s time for the icing on the top! Hugs.
We have so much in common. Glad your meds are better for you. G
were
I never actually knew the definition of trauma. I was glad to learn it. I isolate too. My dog brings me comfort, so does walking and nature. Nutritious food and vitamins/supplements. In addition to blog land I like Al-anon meetings online.
Having a dog must be so good. I need to get a cat at some stage.
how can the pain be so bad, break us, make us unworthy
I’m so sorry for all that’s happened to you. May angels surround and protect you the rest of your life.
Thank you so much. 😇
I understand ~
Thank you.
I can relate to all that you say. I’ve buried it by being a workaholic but is still comes back. I really hope you find the calm, peace and beauty in your life that you deserve. I am extremely isolated too but surrounding myself with beautiful books, nature and my beloved partner (thankful for him every day) this helps me. It’s great to be connected with you 💕 I mostly blog about books and quirky things and occasionally when I’m brave ill talk about my early life. Big hugs
Wow. You have a partner. That must be so healing.
I must say I really appreciate life on a daily basis after all I have been through. G
Yeah I am very grateful for having him. I am so glad you appreciate life 🙏 me too! But especially meeting others who have gone through stuff it is very validating that we are not alone with it and others understand, big hugs