apathy

apathy
/ˈapəθi/
noun
  1. lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern.

I’ve been finding myself with very low motivation of late. Even taking photos has been very difficult to do…

…not only does one have to take photos…

…but then one has to process them…

…and then upload them…

…all too much effort!

this all could be a symptom of depression…

…and depression has been the ‘black dog’ that has been with me since I was 18.

I recently did three weeks of house-sitting. (Dog and a cat). The whole time I felt really bad, and very flat. I was expecting it to be a very pleasant time away from my home, and quality time with the animals. But my experience was the opposite. Very distressing.

Also I recently (last weekend) had a gastroenteritis problem, and ended up in the emergency ward of my local hospital…

Now this has me feeling very unsure about food, and eating food.

That was my second hospitalization, as about a month ago, I had a major panic attack, and ended up in an ambulance and then hospital. No good!

All i want to do is sit on my couch and drink red wine, eat corn chips, and watch TV shows.

It was only today when I needed to:

…buy some Christmas cards…

…write inside them…

…and then put addresses on them…

…and then post them…

I thought… maybe I’m depressed.