me and my eating disorder

I’ve been aware of having an eating disorder since I was twenty something.

consisted of eating a lot of junk food for meals instead of real food.

I know I got it from my mother, as she would…

  • always finish her meal before anyone else.
  • if we had a roast, she would go from the table and start picking at the roast meat.
  • she made a lot of sweet stuff. Loads of baking all the time.
  • she would say things like: “my body needs salt, so these salt and vinegar chips are just what I need”.
  • she was obese, but would tell you that she wasn’t fat at all, “it’s just my shape after having my second child”, and she believed it with all her might.
  • she would say: “I could eat a meal and go on to eat another meal without blinking”.

I would often binge eat and then take laxatives to purge the food. This would put enormous stress on my body, and it was very painful.

I’m now 57 and I love eating. Especially Vietnamese food.

Eating is like a friend, as it feels so good to eat. But I’m now heading to 110 kilograms

My correct weight is supposed to be 80 kg.

My knees really hurt if I try and run. Ouch !

I look in the mirror and freak out.

I’m writing this in the hope I can moderate my food intake.

cheers, Gavin.

3 thoughts on “me and my eating disorder

  1. I’ve been on a weight loss journey for the past year, no diet and lost 36 pounds. I started with cutting my meals in half, then thirds. I cut out high sugar drinks except for one a week and don’t snack. On the odd occasion I do snack it’s a couple of nuts since they are good for you, I’m talking a flat handful is all. I eat two pieces of chocolate a day and drink about 60+ oz of water. My goal each day is 12500-1500 calories a day. This is the best weight plan I’ve ever been on and it’s not a diet. I eat pretty much everything I want just in much smaller portions. After a while my stomach adjust and it will tell you it’s time to stop eating. I’m an emotional eater and I’ve managed this thru one of the most difficult years in recent history. I’m dying. I have Stage 3 Chronic Kidney Disease, maybe 5 years left. You have the strength to do anything you want, you know that. Start believing. Hugs. M

    1. thank you so much.
      Your reply is just what I was looking for.
      I know I can do this…
      (I’m dying. I have Stage 3 Chronic Kidney Disease, maybe 5 years left.)
      you are such an inspiration.
      thanks you. Gavin.

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